Jokes – Set 10 – 2017

#1

Kya le kar aye thay….
Kya le ker jaoge….
Mujhe sms nahi kar k kitne paise bachao ge
Itne paise bacha kar kya…
MOBILE main CNG lagvaoge….

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#2

Choosing Career Is Like Choosing Wife
From 10 GirlFriends.
Even If U Pick Most Beautiful,
Most Intelligent,
Kindest Women,
There’s Still Pain Of Loosing 9

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#3

Khandala song remixed in diff. languages
HINDI:
A Kya Bolti Tu
A Kya Mai Bolu
Sun
Suna
Ati Kya Khandala
Kya karu Ake mai Khandala
Are Ghumenge, nachenge, gayenge Aish karenge or kya
URDU – Best
AAP KUCH BOLEIN
HUM KYA BOLEIN
MULAIZA FARMAYEIN
IRSHAD
TASHREEF LAYEINGI KHANDALA
KYA KAREIN HUM KHANDALA TASHREEF LAAKE
ARRE GHOOMEINGE, NAACHEINGE, NAGMEIN SUNAYEINGE,
TAFREE KAREINGE OR KYA!!
ENGLISH:
Aye what do you say
Aye what should I say
Listen.
Speak on.
Coming to khandala
What should I do, coming to khandala
We’ll roam, we’ll loaf, we’ll sing, we’ll dance we’ll
freak, baby,what else
SANSKRIT : This is too good
Aye balike, twam katham kathisyasi
Aye balakah aham kim kathisyamh
Shrinvasi!
Shrunha
Kim twam khandaalaa agchasyasi
Aham kim kurwasyami khandaalayeh
gamisyami, bhramisyami, nryuthyami, gaayami, maja
karishma, kim karishyam …….

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#4

usse pyar kar k meri kismat jaag gaye
usse pyar kar k meri kismat jaag gaye
main ny itny lvu letter post kiye k
WOH POST MAN k sath bhag gaye ….

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#5

Bahoo k 1st & 2nd affair per sussar ne mara,
3rd & 4th per husband ne mara,
MAGAR SAAS CHUP RAHI KYON
….
Kyonke saas b kabhi bahoo thi..

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#6

Memon: Ye Kela Kaise diya
Keley Wala:1 rupee
Memon:60 paise ka deta hai
Keley wala:60 paise main to sirf chilka milega
Memon:Le 40 paise, chilka rakh aur kela de!

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#7

Jab Kutte Ki Maut aati hai to…
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
Wo Mar Jata hai…

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#8

sweet raho
Taufi ki tarah,
fresh raho
close-up ki tarah,
Beautiful raho
fair & lovely ki tarah,
Aur smart raho,
‘Adnan Sami’ ki tarah

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#9

Aik kanjoos ke ghar
aag lag gai,
wo apne ghar ko bacha nahi saka,
kyun ke woh saari raat
fire brigade walon ko
missed call marta raha 🙂

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#10

aap ki
Ankhien
jheel k jaisi
gehri hain
dil chahta hai k.
kay
in main
machliyaan choor doon
><(((:> ><(((:>
><))):> ><))):>

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#11

aik phathan apne shoulder pe parrot ko bitha ke ja raha tha
kissi ne poocha ‘ ye janwar kahan se laye ho ‘
parrot foran bola ‘peshawar se’

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#12

Main nay tujhay deekha ,
Dhekta raha,
Dhekhta hi gaya,
Phir mujhay chashma lag gaya.

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#13

Aik sardar kafi der sa apna Nikah Nama ko bohat
gor se dekh raha tha us ki bewi ne kaha
‘Tusi Ki Dekh Rahey Ho ‘
Sardar’ EXPIRY DATE nahi mil rahi hai’

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#14

1 Khwab’1 Khayal’1 Haqiqat ho tum.
Dosti men pernay wali har zarorat ho tum.
Jis ko roz SMS krne ko dil kare.
ARRE YAR AJEEB MUSIBAT HOO TUM…

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#15

Aaj mosam may kuch ajeeb si baat hai,
Aaj beqaboo se mere jazbat hain,
Jee chahta hai k tum ko chura loo tum se,
Per MAMA kehti hai k chori kerna buri baat hai…..

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#16

——
——–
———-
Samjhe
nahi samjhe..
Lagta hai mere mobile ko tumhare mobile se Ishq hogaya hai tabhi
LINE maar raha hai

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#17

a boy to a girl:mam app ki sendal bari piyari hai
girl:utroon kaya
boy:mam jeans jada piyari hai

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#18

kya halat hogai hai zamane ki,
sab ko aadat hogai hai paisay bachane ki,
sms to company ne kab ke sastey ker diye,
per fitrat nahi badli chillar bachane ki…….

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#19

machar ne ek admi ko din main kata,
‘tum to raat main kat tay ho na
machar ne jawab dia;
ghar k halat kharab hain over time kerna par raha hai 🙂

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#20

KASH AAP HAMARI GALI MAIN AEIN
THORA ITRAIEN
THORA SHERMAIN
THORA MOSKARAIN
THORA GHABRAIEN
AUR PHIR ZOR SE AWAZ LAGAIEN TEEN DABA WAICH LO….

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#21

Aap Ne Mujh Ko Dekha.
Phir Aap Mere Peeche Aaye.
Aatey Gaye.
Phir
Phir
Phir
Phir Kiya
Mujhe
Aap Ko 1 Rupya Dena Hi Para.

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#22

Shetan ki 3 nishanian
1=SMS milte hi parhta hey.
2=parhte hue hansta hey.
3=neeche mat jana—->
Jis kaam se roko wo zarur karta hey..

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#23

kash tu mera bkra honda….
teno piyar nal patte panda…
tere singaan no phar ke halanda…
te tenu piyar nal pochda .
tu pagal wan ke main….
tey tu piyar nal bolda …..
mainnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

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#24

Wafa Se Pyar Mat Karna,
KYOUN NAHI KARNA…
Kyoun K ……….
Bin Maut Maare Jaogay !!
KYOUN
Arey Bhai
‘WAFA’
Osama Bin Laden Ki Beti Ka Naam Hai .

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#25

Main kitna intezar karoon,
Main kis se piyar karoon,
Jab se tum ne milna chor diya he,
Khushbu ne bikharna chor diya he,
Phoolon ne mehakna chor diya he,
Chiryun ne chehakna chor diya he,
Chand ne chamakna chor diya he,
Aur dil ne bhi darakna chor diya he,
Savan jane ko he,Bahar aane ko he,
Phool khilne ko hain,
Sab dost milne ko hain,
Ab to aa jao,
Main kitna intezar karoon
Main kis se piyar karoon…… !!

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#26

Adhi rat ko admi apni moti biwi say: Begum sisak sisak k marna acha hay ya aik dum Biwi: Aik dum.Admi: Acha to apni doosri taang b meray uper rukh do.

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#27

Aaj ek zindagi aur jilo!Aaj ek sapna aur dekhlo!Aaj thodi si khushia aur bat looAaj ek SMS aur karlo!Aaj Bas Aaj..!kya pata KAL HO NA HO ! #

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#28

Maan beti se’aray yai kibab pelay pelay se hain aur karway bi
beti’amman!aap ne hi to kha tha k jab kou cheez jal jaey tu usse
Burnal laga dia jaey

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#29

Momino!
Aakhrat Kareeb ha,Aap sub se request ha k apna mobile mein save
jokes ,pictures, girl friend k number,
DELETE
Karna se pehle mujhe forward kar dain.
JIZAKALLAH.

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#30

ch pervaiz ellahi had 4 sons
monas ellahi
karim ellahi
shabir ellahi
nd wazir ellahi
when his 5th son born his wife named him bas kar ellahi

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#31

yeh chori chori ana jana chohr do
yeh chupke chupke nazrye milana chohr do
khoob pito gay tum masjidon se jootye churana chohr do

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#32

ek ladki thi diwani si
sunder si lambi si
nazrein jhukake sharmake
galion se guzra karti thi
latak matak chalti thi
aur kaha karti thi
bartan le lo bartan

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#33

mental Hospital ki Opreation Thearter main.
Opretion Thearter……..
saman Mojod…………….
.Doctore mojod………
………………Nurs Mojod…..
Magar…
Pagal…..
SMS Parny main Masroof ……HAhahahahahahahhaha

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#34

Hum Tumhaien chahtay hain aesay..
Hum Tumhaien chahtay hain aesay..
zero balance wala koi………
balance chahta ho jaisay

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#35

Molvi apni wife say:
jab me mar jaon to samnay walay ghar ki aurton ko zroor bulana.
Biwi:wo kyun
Molvi: unki aurtain murday se lipat lipat ker roti hain!!

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#36

ZAMANA KITNA KARAB HOGAYA HA.
HAR SAWAL KA ULTA JAWAB HOGAYA HA.
NA CALL NA MISSCALL NA SMS KA JAWAB.
HAR KOI MOBILE RAKHA K NAWAB HOGAYA HA..

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#37

woh garam garam pani
woh garam garam pani.
woh sabun ki khushboo.
woh bathroom main shampoo ki bottle
khair tum kya janoo rooz rooz nahane main kitna maza aata hai

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#38

Police ko aik body milli hai,
kaalay teeth hain,
ghonslay jaisay baal hain,
dimagh nhi hai,
paon ultay hain,
mughay tumhari fikkar ho rahi hai,
zara bell tu karo

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#39

Mahiwal ne awaz lagai sahni daur ke aayi
ranjha ne bansuri bajayi aur heer bhag ke chali aayi
aur ham ne sirf siti bajayi, wo ma ko lay aayi…

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#40

aik poultry farm walay ne sab murghion ko order dia,
ke kal sab ne 2-2 anday denay hain,
jis ne na diye to us ki khair nahi
next day sab ne 2 anday diye sirf aik ne 1 anda diya,
malik ne poocha to jawab mila
‘ sarkar ye aik anda bhi aap k khouf se nikal aya,
warna main to murgha hoon’

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#41

teri zulfon mein kho jana chahta hoon
teri zulfon mein kho jana chahta hoon
per tu tel hi itna lagati hai ke har baar phisal jata hoon

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#42

Yahan Bhi KHuda Hai Wahan Bhi KHuda Hai,
JAhan Dekho KHuda Hi Khuda Hai,
Jidher Nahi KHuda Hai Udher Kal Khudega…!

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#43

Aik Truck Dosrey Ko Khench Kar Lejaraha Tha Yeh Dekh
Kar Sardar Zore Zore Se Hansney Laga Or Zameen Par Lot
Pot Hokre bola : Ek Rassi Ko Uthaney Ke Liye 2 2 Truck .`

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#44

Wife: Tum mujhe Kitna Pyar Krte ho
Hus: Shahjahan Jitna.
Wife: Mere Marne k bad TajmahaL banwaoge
Hus: Mein ne to PLot Bhi Le Liya hai, DeLay to Tum Kr Rahi ho..

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#45

‘BREAKING NEWS’. . . dhamaka khabar. Tib ki duniya mein tehalka mach
gaya.khabar mili hai k kal amjad khusre ke han kaka hua.kaise hua hamein
khud nahi pata,chalen chal ke amjad khusre se khud hi pochte hain. G
amjad g. . . .Amjad g!msg he parhta rahay ga ya kuch bataye ga bhi

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#46

God apun se pucha,
Kidhar jana mangta
SWARG YA NARAK
Apun bola NARAK !
Apun ko malum,
Tum sala dost log udharich milega,
Bole to Jidhar tum, Woich apun ka SWARAG ! ! !

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#47

sardar g apni sister k sath kahin ja rahe thhay k
kisi larkay ne awaz d oye mashooq ko le kr kidar ja rahe ho
sardar g ne ghusa se chilatay hua jowab diya oye oye mashooq ho
gi teri meri to behan he 🙂

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#48

Msg ka lain dain yuhi chalta rahega,
pyar ka silsila barta rahega,
aap delete karte reh jaoge,
per apka dil or cell hamare pyar bhare sms se barta rahega

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#49

55 56
Dekha tujhe to rooh khush ho gayi,
Ek kami thi vo bhi puri ho gayi,
Pagal hain vo log jo kehte hain ki,
Chimpanzi ki aakhri nasal kahin khoo gayi…!

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#50

Kunwaro se log puchte hai ki tumhari ab tak shaadi kyon nahi huye
Kunware bhi jor se kahte hai: Jaako rakhe sayeean mar sake na koi.