Jokes – Set 82 – 2017

#1

Pathan Bought A Car On Loan…

—– —
#2

Lardka: tumari ankhen ktni haseen hai,

—– —
#3

Admi Dukan Dar Se: Zara Jaldi Se Mujhe Ek Zanana Chapal Dijiye

—– —
#4

BHIKAARI: 1 RUPIYA DE DE, MAIN NE 3 DIN SE KHAANA NAHIN KHAAYEA HAI,

—– —
#5

ik pagal gusy main;

—– —
#6

1 memon 14th floor se neche gira

—– —
#7

Santa Police se: Kal rat chor mere ghar se TV ke Ilaaava sab samaan le gaye

—– —
#8

Girlfriend: Mere birthday par tum mujhe ring doge na

—– —
#9

Boy to father: “Baap idhar aa”. Mother:”Aise nahin bolte beta, Daddy ko izzat se bulate hai” Boy: “Baap, izzat se idhar aa!”.

—– —
#10

History teacher: From where did the Mughals rule

—– —
#11

Memon Boss 2 worker:Tumne is saal Mehnat se kam kai, Islie 5000 ka Bonus Cheque de raha Hu,

—– —
#12

1 parents apnay betay k liye aisa robot laye jo jhoot bolnay per thapar marta hay.

—– —
#13

Aik shakhs hospital main ro raha tha…

—– —
#14

Four guys 1 from Harward: 1 Oxford 1 Texas & a Sardar from Pujab university

—– —
#15

“MBBS Final Exam“

—– —
#16

dOOR gaon, main jab

—– —
#17

Door Ho Jao, Ye SmS 5 Second K Baad Phat Jayega! 00:05 00:04 00:03 00:02 00:01 00:00 —————————— Nahi Phata Naqli (fake) Ye Bhi China Ka Maal Nikla

—– —
#18

1admi bola jb mere bchy hun gy to 1ko karachi aur 1ko lahore chor aonga.

—– —
#19

Height Of Dreaming:

—– —
#20

Kashmir ki Wadiyon me Barfili hawaon main jhil k kinare bethe RANJHA ko HEER ne kia kaha “ULLU K PATHE” HERO mat ban, Sweater Pehen Le

—– —
#21

Ek Bihari ko Raaste me cycle ka paidal mila aur use uthakar Ghar le aya. Ghar laa kar Biwi ko bola ye sambhal ke rakhde, isme cycle dalwa lenge.

—– —
#22

Teacher says to student, In Algebra A=B & B=C. It means A=C.

—– —
#23

Once a Rich Man asked a Poor Man: “Shaadi mai MehnaT hai Ya MAza ”

—– —
#24

A man was dying of cancer.

—– —
#25

Wife: I wish I was a newspaper

—– —
#26

Husband:u will never succeed in making that dog obey u! Wife:Nonsense it’s only a matter of patience, I had a lot of trouble with u at first.

—– —
#27

Sardar to Shopkeeper:- Mujhe India Ka Flag Dikhao, Shopkeeper ne Flag dikhaya.

—– —
#28

Ladies hostel caught Fire It took 1 hour to bring the Fire under control & another 3 hrs 2 bring d Firemen under control.

—– —
#29

God thought that since he couldnt b everywhere he made a mother.

—– —
#30

Titanic was sinking. An englishman asked Santa, “How far is land” Santa: 2 KMs. Englishman jumped into sea. Englishman: Now, which direction (left or right) Santa: Downwards!

—– —
#31

Sardar : Apne bete se bola, Baywaqoof…kaisa machis lay k aaya hai, ek bhi tili nahin jalti.

—– —
#32

Sardar: Raat mujhe ek aadmi ne chaku dikhakar loot liya.

—– —
#33

In art gallery couple sees picture of a girl covered by leaf. Husband keeps watching.

—– —
#34

A sardar passing through a jungle. A churail stops him & says: HOO HOO HA HA,Main churail hoon.

—– —
#35

Guddu gana ga raha tha, “aaj main ooper Aasma neechay” To Pappu nay Guddo ko bohut maara, Bhala kion kion k Aasma pappu ki behan thi. hehe:p

—– —
#36

Boy: BUS aur LARKI aik jaisi hoti hain, 1 jaati hai to doosri aa jati hai.

—– —
#37

Pathan ki mangni hoi, usey pata chala k uski mangaiter ka kisi se koi affair nahi tha, us nay yeh keh ker mangni tor di k jo kisi aur ki nahi ho saki wo meri kia ho gi 😉

—– —
#38

Ek chotta baccha apni pregnant mummy se puchta hai: isme kya hai.

—– —
#39

A man went to hell and asked the Yamraj if he can call his wife. yamraj said “u cn do tht”

—– —
#40

Husband: Today is sunday, I have to enjoy it.

—– —
#41

Boy : Jan-e-man! Totay howay dil se pyaar karogi ya dil tootnay tak pyaar karogi

—– —
#42

Doctor ne admi se pucha … Kia aap ka aur aapki biwi ka khoon aik hi hai

—– —
#43

One day a man inserted an ‘advertisement’ in the local classifieds: “Wife wanted”.

—– —
#44

What is Marriage Ans: 1 year:-Alpenlibe-Ji lalchaye raha Na Jaye. 2 year:- KINETIC-Sab ki hawa Nikal de. 3 year:-CHLORMINT- DOBARA MAT PUCHNA…

—– —
#45

Shadi kernay aur mobile kharidnay k baad aik hi baat ka afsos hota hay kaash thori dair aur ruk jaatay to acha model mil jata. =))

—– —
#46

Bush ne bivi ko surprise dene k lie Naqli darhi monchain laga k rat ko chupke se bister men so gaya.

—– —
#47

1 night bijli chali gae…

—– —
#48

Santa sing ka 20 saal bad bacha hua. Wo udas ho gaya.

—– —
#49

WOMAN: Sir mein apne larke ka naam kya rakhoon AJIT: Iska naam Peter rakh do! WOMAN: Meera doosra larka bhi hai jo iskaa twin hai, Mein uskaa naam kya rakhon AJIT: Us kaa naam Repeter rakh do!

—– —
#50

Ek kanjoos k ghar ko aag lag gai,wo apne ghar ko bacha nahi saka…kyoki wo sari raat fire brigade walo ko misssed call marta raha.