Cool Jokes – Set 2 – 2017

#1

I Always pray for You that.
May your life Be Bright & Sunny.
& your partner be Fat & Funny
May your life be filled with Roses
&
U have Children with pheeni pheeni Noses.

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#2

Koi PYAR Karnay wala Agar DUKH Day
Aur
Aapki Aankho May Aansu Aa Jaye
To
Is Yakeen k Saath
Aansu Saaf karna
k
Ab is Kaminay Ki Bhi Watt Lagani Hai Zaroor!

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#3

Billi ne Choohey K Ghar Se Aaya Howa Rishta Thukra Diya.
.
.
.
Wajah?
.
.
.
Aap Kyon Tension Le Rahy Ho.
Ye Un k Ghar ka Masla Hai. 🙂

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#4

Best Error Message of Century!!!
An Error Shown by a Computer:
No Keyboard Connected,
Press F1 To Continue. 🙂

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#5

1 Larka Doosre Larke Se:
Yaar Tumne Kabhi Koi Larki Phansai hai?
Doosra: Yaar Larki To Maine Phansa li thi.
Par Tum Logon ne ye Mohalla hi Chor Diya. 🙂

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#6

If I’ve hurt you any time Anywhere.
If my SMS is disturbing you.
Then seriously
I wanna say just 3 Words.
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.
.
.
‘I WILL CONTINUE’
KARLO JO KARNA HAI. 🙂

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#7

A Girl Asks Her Mommy: I Want Some Fresh Air,
Can I Go For a Walk?
.
.
.
Mommy: Alright, But Ask your Fresh Air to Drop you Home By 10 P.M. 🙂

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#8

Commerce Professor Asks the Student:
What is the Most Important Source of Finance for Starting Business?
Student: ‘Father in Law’. 🙂

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#9

* HAPPY *
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Means ‘Khush’ 🙂

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#10

A Lady Broke a Signal and was Presented in front of Judge:
Lady: Your Honor plz Let Me Go, I’m a School Teacher and I’m getting
late for my class.
Judge: Alas! So You are a Teacher,
I have Waited for This Moment all My life, Now Write Down
‘I WILL NEVER GO THROUGH A RED LIGHT’
5000 TIMES AND I WILL LET U GO. 🙂

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#11

Very Important Health Tips:
Please Don’t Eat
Pizzas,
Samosay,
Sandwich,
Ice Cream,
Chocolate,
And
Dahi Barray.
Without,
ME…
OK?

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#12

BABLOO: Allah Kary Mama ki ZABAN CUT Jaye.
Rozana Dant’ti Hain.
AGLY DIN ZABAN CUT JATI HAI!
BABLOO: Allah Kary Bhai ka HAAT TOOT Jaye
Mujhy Tang krty hain.
AGLAY DIN TOOT JATA HAI!
BABLOO: Allah Mere BAAP ko UTHA LE Bohat MARTAY hain.
AGLAY DIN ABBA GHAR AATA HAI.
BABLOO: Aapko Kuch Nahi hua?
ABBA: Nahi.
BABLOO: Aur Ammi Kahan hain?
ABBA: Parros Mai Basheer Sahab ki Death ho Gayi hai,
Wahan Gayi hain! 😀

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#13

If Time Doesn’t Wait For You.
Don’t Worry!
Just Remove the Battery From the Clock and Enjoy life!
‘Aah! Great People Great Thoughts.’ 🙂

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#14

When Some1 Touches U and U Don’t Feel it,
It’s Ignorance.
When Some1 Touches U and U feel it,
It’s Love.
When Nobody Touches U and U Still Feel it,
.
.
.
.
Bhag le beta ‘BHOOT’ hai. 🙂

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#15

Do yo know why There is Gaps between Fingers?
No?
Bcoz!
.
Someone will come in your Life,
will Hold your hand & slowly say:
‘Le Pakar! GOLD LEAF ka Sutta laga!’

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#16

Waqt Zaya Na Karo.
Ek Ek Minute Qeemti Hai.
Waqt Ki Qadar Us Shakhs Se Pucho Jo.
Bathroom Ki Line Main Khara Ho Aur Andar Wala Bolay:
‘Bus Ek Minute Aur’ 🙂

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#17

Barsaat Ki Ek Khubsoorat Raat Main.
Shabnam se Bheeg K.
Ek Doosray se Takratay Huye.
Ek Phool Ne Doosray Phool Se Kaha.
Ab Takkar Maari To Sir Phaar Don ga. 🙂

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#18

Film Actress Meera Yesterday screamed in an interview:
‘Agar Mein Jhoot Bolon to Mera Baap Marr Jaaye’.
The City District Government of Lahore has reported that 26 Men from
various parts of Lahore simultaneously suffered a Heart Attack last night.

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#19

Maine Poocha Chand se…
Kabhi Dekha hai Mere Yaar sa Haseen…..
Chand bola….
12036 Entries Found! 🙂

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#20

One of The Best Messages I’ve Ever Received.
Life is Beautiful…
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.
*Conditions Apply.
Excluding All Taxes. 🙂

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#21

Mom: Kyon Rotey Ho?
Son: Dad ne Mujhe Kiss Nahi di.
Mom: Tumne Tables Nahi Sunaye hon gey.
Son: Kaam Wali ko Kon se Tables Aatey hain? 🙂

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#22

Ek Kanwaari Larki, Pehli Baar Ek Larkay Se Akele Main Mili….
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Baqiya Hissa Ramzan k Baad. 🙂

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#23

Who is the Leader of Ducks?
Ans. Frog
Why?
Because Frog is MAINDUCK.

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#24

Agar
Is
Waqt
Aap
So
Rahy
Thy
Aur
Mere
Msg
Se
Bohat
Tang
Huye
To.
MISSION
SUCCESSFUL. 😉

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#25

Pay Waao Zabar
‘PO’
Noon Sakin ‘PON’
Kaaf Alif Zabar ‘KA’
‘PONKA’
Shabash Bacha.

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#26

Once Upon a Time there was a sexy girl.
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Haya Kar.
O Baigharat, Ramzan Hain.

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#27

1 Aadmi ka inteqal ho gaya:
Uska dost us ki BV k paas aaya Or bola:
Kya main us ki jagah le sakta hoon?
B.V: Mujhe koi Aitraz nahi Hai
QABRASTAN walon se pooch lo…

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#28

AMAZING FACTS
An Ostrich’s eye is bigger than its Brain.
Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump.
TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
‘Go,’ is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
It’s physically impossible for you to lick your elbow.
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Almost everyone who reads this will try to Lick Their Elbow. 🙂

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#29

In main se koi ek cheez select karen:
1. Hathora
2. Handle
3. Gun
4. Pipe
5. Tube
6. Mike
7. Rod
8. Danda
9. Joota
10. Chappal
Aur Apnay sir pe maar len.
Shukriya. 😛

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#30

Biwi: Mere khayal main hamari beti ki kisi Larkay k sath Setting ho gai hai…
Husband: Woh kese?
Biwi: Kyon k woh kafi dino se Balance k Paise nahi maang rahi hai.

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#31

1 Murghi Super Market gai Aur kaha: 1 Anda dena.
Salesman: Tum anday ka kya karogi?
Murghi: Mere Murghay ne kaha hai Darling! 5 Rupay k Liye Tum Apna Figure Kharab Mat karo.

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#32

Pyar Pyar Pyar
Pyar Pyar Pyar
Pyar Pyar Pyar
Pyar Pyar Pyar
Dekha!
Kitna Pyaar bhara msg kya hai tumko.
Kisi aur ne kabhi bheja kya?

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#33

Jab Ghee Seedhi ungli se na niklay to.
..
..
..
..
..
..
Chamcha Istemaal karo.
Har cheez main ungli karna achi baat nahi hai. 😉

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#34

I pray that Any Person who Tries to Steal your Happiness.
May his hips begin to itch badly.
And
His arms grow shorter so that they cant reach hips to scratch it.. 😉

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#35

Jaan-e-Jan tum kaho to Taaray torr k le aaon.
Jaan-e-Wafa ishara karo to Hawaon k rukh morr don.
Jaan-e-Tamanna ik baar kaho ye Jaan tum par waar don.
Usne meri aankhon main jhaankha aur
Dheeray se boli:
‘C H H O R U’

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#36

SMS Poora parhna Please…..
Barri Meharbani…..

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#37

Shadi main Khana khany k 2 usool.
Rule 1:
Pehli baar is tarha khao k dosri baar nahi milega.
Rule 2:
Doosri baar is tarha khao k pehli bar mila he nahi.
####
* Story *
?
?
?
INTERVAL
?
?
?
THE END
Full Of Suspence.

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#38

Pappu Jahaz main khara hua aur Zor se chillaya ‘HI JACK’…
Sab ronay lagy.
Or Pareshan ho gaye.
Kuch dair bad Jack uth kar bola: ‘HI PAPPU.’ 🙂

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#39

Give A Person A Fish And You Feed Him For A Day,
Teach A Person To Use The Internet And He Won’t Bother You For Weeks …

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#40

Neend aati hai to Khuab aata hai,
Khuabon main Ek Larki aati hai,
Larki k peechy uska Baap aata hai,
Phir
Na Neend aati hai, Na Khuab aata hai.

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#41

Maa ne kaha HAVELI chhor do,
Paro ne kaha DAARO chhor do,
Andhay ne kaha mujhe SARAK k us PAAR chhor do.
Ek din aayega, Jab GirlFriend kahegi:
BHAI in Bachon ko Zara School Chhor do.

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#42

3 Friends Bangali, Pakistani, Indian
Jo is Dunbay k 7 1 Rat Guzary Ga Us Ko 25000 Inam Dia Jay Ga.
Sub S Phelay Bangali : Wo Dunbay walay Room M Gya R Wapis AA Gia Us Nay Kha K M 50000 doon ga Laken Is K 7 Ni Rahoon Ga.
Phir Pakistani: Pakistani Gya Bht Jaldi Wapis AA Gya K M B Ap Ki Har Shart Manzoor Krta Hoon Laken Us Dunbay K 7 1 Sec Ni Gazaroon Ga
AAKhir M Indian Gya: Indian Jasy He andur Gya Dunba Bahir AA Gya.

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#43

1 Nursery class ka bacha bola:
Miss main aapko kesa lagta hon?
Miss: So Sweet..
Bacha apny side k larky se aankh maar kar bola:
Maine kaha tha na Line Maarti hai..

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#44

Please is SMS ko itna SEND karo k Meri hony wali Biwi tak pohanch jaye:
‘JAAN Tum kahan rehti ho? Apna Address to bata do.’
Please meri Madad karen.

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#45

Man 1: I notice that Ur Daughter is mostly in the kitchen,
Probably she loves cooking many varieties.
Man 2: No! Actually our Telephone connection is in the kitchen.

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#46

Girl: Ye jo Samnay Larka betha hai mujhe ek Ghantay se Pareshan kar raha hai.
Waiter: Lekin woh to aapki taraf dekh bhi nahi raha.
Girl: Yehi to Preshani hai.

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#47

Where Do U Find MANGOES?
Mango Tree?
No!
Fruit Shop?
Wrong Again.
Phir?
Ans: Jaha Jaha Women Goes,
Peeche Peeche MAN GOES!!

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#48

When your life is in darkness pray to God ask him to free you from darkness
And after if you pray and your still in darkness.
Please pay your
ELECTRICITY BILL.

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#49

Tips to beat the Summer:
1. Drink lot of Fresh Water.
2. Cover you Head when outside.
3. Eat Vegetables.
But Most Important
4. Msg me Daily,
Because I am So Cooool

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#50

Maloom hai Aap bohat Busy ho…
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Is liye kuch nahi likha,
Warna aapko parhna parrta. 🙂