Comprehensive collection of General Jokes. The compilation includes some good quality text messages which can be shared on various messenger apps and social network platforms. Browse through nice repository of General Jokes with latest and new Jokes being added quite often. You will find some new, unique & interesting Jokes and messages. Explore best and rare collection of General Jokes here, select any text from the wide range and share or send using mobile. Apart from General Jokes, the collection also includes Jokes in other categories.
Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Delhi in two days time
Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will.
Customer : I bet you, it won t.
Post Master : Why not
Customer : It s addressed to Mumbai.
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#2
wif: bus karo rat k 12 baje se kar rahe ho or subah ke 8 ho chuke hai.thake nahi
husbd: abhi to kuch nahi kiya ab to din rat karuga q k.mere 1000 msg free hai.
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#3
Santa: Tumnay new car kb li
Banta: Ek din ek larki mujhey apni car mai bhita kar lay gai, aur
kapray utar kar boli jo chahiye lay lo, maine car lay li
Santa: Changa keeta kapray ki karnay siiiiii (well done, what you will do with cloths!)
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#4
DO MAINDHAK BAITHE THE.
EK BOLA- TARR
DOOSRA BOLA- TARR
PEHLA FIR BOLA- TARR
DOOSRA FIR BOLA- TARR
PEHLA BOLA- FARR
DOOSRA BOLA- AE TU TOPIC MAT CHANGE KAR…
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#5
nurse-mubarak ho aapke ghar beta paida huwa hai
santa- wah g wah kya technology hai BV meri hospital me hai aur baccha ghar paida huwa hai.
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#6
Man 1 : I Got Married Bcoz I Was Tired Of Cooking, Cleaning Home n Washing Clothes
Man 2: Amazing, I Got Divorce For The Same Reason…
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#7
British- Do u know swimming
Indan- No!
British- Dog is better than u! It swims!
Indian- Do u know swimming
British- Yes!
Indian- Then wat is d differens betwn U & Dog 😉
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#8
Ek Ladka Ladki Dekne Gaya
Dono 10 minute Tak Bat karte rahe
Ladki – Bhaiya aap kitne bhai-Bahen Ho
Ladka:- Abtak 3 The par Ab 4 Ho Gaye
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#9
Teacher: Draw a diagram of bacteria. Pappu: Here it is sir. Teacher: Where You haven t drawn anything. Pappu: Sir can you see bacteria without Microscope
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#10
Train chali, Sardar Ji ik Dibbe me Chad gaye.
TT bola: Q phaji Dikta nahi, Ladies ka dibba haii
Sardar Ji: Sorry Ji Sorry ! Mere ko laga aap Mard ho…
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#11
snata ne call milayi to aage se aawaz aayi …. aaapke khate me is call k liye bkaya rashi nai hai ….
snta : o koi ni9 soniye tere baat ho gyi ye kya kam hai
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#12
Jo aap ko dil se pyar karay…Aap per jaan nisar karay..Aap ka sadda intizaar karay…Aap ki eik adda per qatal hazar karay…
WOH KOYE PAGAL HI HO GHA..
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#13
Doctor to lady: kiya aap dilevery k waqat bache k baap ko apne pass dekhna chati hain
Lady: nahi un ko mere husband pasand nahi karte.
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#14
Histry Of Pakorey
Ek Baloach Besan Ki Balls Bana Kr Garam Oil Mein Dal Raha Tha..
Jb Thori Dair Bad Bhi Wo Kac’che The To Baloach Bola
‘PAKO REY’ ..
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#15
BHIKAARI: 1 RUPIYA DE DE,
MAIN NE 3 DIN SE KHAANA NAHIN KHAAYEA HAI,
MEMON: 100 RUPE DOON GA PEHLE YEH BATA
1 RUPIYE ME KHAANA KAHAN MILTA HAI
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#16
Teen bachche apne baap ki taarif kar rahe the.
1st- Mere pitaji bahut garam chai pi jate hain.
2nd- Bas mere pitaji to khaulta hua chai aaram se pi jate hain.
3rd- Ye to kuch bhi nahi,
mere pitaji to chaypatti,dudh,shakkar,
muh me dal lete hain aur
stove par baith jaate hai
..
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#17
Boss: Santa, bring two corner tickets for movie for me & my GF. Santa brought two corner tickets A1 & A15.
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#18
Train mai ek husband apni wife say: ‘tujh say shadi kar k pachta raha hoon.’
‘dil karta hai tujhe kutttay k aagay daal doon’
Samnay wala passenger bola: ‘bhao bhao’
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#19
SMS karne ke fayde
1.mai bhi khush
2.jise bhejo wo bhi khush
3.yado ka silsila bana rehta hai
4.kaun KANJUS hai wo bhi pata chalta hai…!
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#20
Eight man r raping a woman ..the woman is laughing nonstop ..so after the men get bugged n ask her y she laughing ..she replies mujhe AIDS hai *******
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#21
no visits……
no calls….
no sms’s……
no letter’s…..
no missed calls……
I am worried….
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Kya hua zoo waalon ne dobara pakad liya kya
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#22
Shaadi ke pehle – Ek Duje Ke Liye
Shaadi ke baad – Sirf Bachcho Ke Liye
Shaadi ke pehle – Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge
Shaadi ke baad – Baaki Log Sukhi Ho Jayenge
Shaadi ke pehle – Chandramukhi
Shaadi ke baad – Jwaalamukhi
Shaadi ke pehle – Maine Pyar Kiya
Shaadi ke baad – Ye Maine Kya Kiya
Shaadi ke pehle – Ek Duje Ke Liye
Shaadi ke baad – Sirf Bachcho Ke Liye
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#23
Judge: Tum ne ek hi raat mein 7 jagah chori ki
Chor: Haan Sahib, Mai mehnat se gi nahi churata.
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#24
Unse Pyar Karke Kismat Jaag Gayi; Wah-Waah-
Unse Pyar Karke Kismat Jaag Gayi; Wah Waah-!
Itne Love Letter Post Kiye Ki Woh POSTMAN Ke Saath Bhag Gayi…
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#25
Pappu and Tippu order coffee.
Pappu: drink fast.
Tippu : ‘Why
Pappu : ‘it is written out there, hot coffee Rs.5/- cold coffee Rs.10/-‘
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#26
TEACHER : PAPPU, how do you spell crocodile PAPPU : K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L TEACHER : No, that s wrong PAPPU : Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
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#27
A man siting wid his wife in a bar, another llady came 2 His Wife & says ‘PAISE PHALE LE LENA, ye admi Bhad me kit-kit karta hai.’
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#28
5 frogs were sitting on a wall
4 decided to jump off.
How many left now
still 5.
because There.s a lot of difference between
Deciding and doing
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#29
GADHE ke samne 1 PAANI ki & 1 DARU ki balti rakhi’
GADHA Paani pi gaya.
Police ne sharabi se pucha- Tune is se kya sikha
Sharabi- Jo DAARU nahi pita vo GADHA hai…
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#30
Theres only one perfect child in the world
&
every mother has it.
Theres only one perfect wife in the world
&
every neighbor has it!
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#31
Ye batao ki aap mein aur pepsi mein kya samanta he
.
.
.
.
.
Both are cool, sab pasand karte he,
Most IMP- Dimag ki jagah dhakkan he
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#32
Banta: Wo ladki deaf lagti hai.
Main kuch kehta hoon, woh kuch aur hi bolti hai.
Santa: Kaise
Banta: Maine kaha I Luv U,
to woh boli Maine kal hi Nayi Sandal kharidi hain
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#33
Aman Mujra Dekhne Gaya,Sari Raat Mujra Dekhta Raha
Bai:Sahab Humne Aap Ko Khush Kiya,Ab Aap Hamain Khush Karo.
Aman Utha Or Khud Nachne Laga.
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#34
Mother: Did you enjoy first day of your school. Boy: It means i have to back again tommorow.
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#35
santa- 1+1=3 karna ho to do ki shadhi karwa do
banta- 1+1=11 karna ho to do ka nikha karva do
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#36
Santa Ricksey wale se :- Oy Railway Station Jayega.
Reckse wala:- hanji.
Santa:- To jao n yaha kyo khare ho.
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#37
Agar basanti ki mausi takhur ko rakhi bandey tho
tho mauki ka takhur se kya rishta hoga
free mey dimag mat lagao yaar takhur ke hath he nahi hai
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#38
Sardar: Agr 1 Hathi Sui k Surakh me se guzarne ki koshish kr rha ho
to usy rokny k lie kia krna chahye
Pathan: Us ki dum pe girah laga do, phans jae ga .
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#39
main nai apne ghar walo samjha dia hai wo sab maan gaye hai. aap bhi apney ghar walo ko bata do. wo b man jaye gay. akhir ye baat kab tak hum chupaingay
1 na 1 din tu pata chal jay ga Q na khoud hi bata den acha hai
k
k
k
shan biryani masale k 7 qurma masala free hai…
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#40
cat: how old r u
elephant:15 years.
cat:but u look big.
elephant:i am a complan boy!
cat:i’m 30.
elephant:but u look small.
cat:i’m ponds age miracle.
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#41
Tom : How should I convey the
news to my father that I ve failed
David: You just send a telegra – Result declared, past year s performance repeated
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#42
Love: Police wala:
Tumne PAPPITA bechne wali ko KISS kyun kiya
Hajoor wo hi bar bar chilla rahi thi
PAPPI ta le lo
PAPPI ta le lo..!
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#43
Santa- Mujhse Wada Kar Ki Teri Biwi ki 1st Kiss mujhe Lene Dega.
Banta- Waada Hai Par Meri Bhi 1 Shart Hai
Santa- Wo Kya
Banta- Mai Shaadi TeriBahan se Karunga
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#44
1 parents apnay betay k liye aisa
robot laye jo jhoot bolnay per thapar marta hay.
Son:Abu aj mei bemar hon school nahi jaonga
Chatakh!
Baap:tumne jhot bola, me jub tumhare
jitna tha kabhi jhoot nahin bolta tha
Chatakh!
Mom:Kia howa
Baap:Yeh chintu jhoot bolta hai
MoM:Zahir hy apka hi beta hay..
Chatakh .!!!:-)
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#45
Is ko zara jaidi jaidi parho
how.
HOW..
HOW.. HOW.. HOW.. HOW..
HOW
HOW
HOW…
HOW
HOW… HOW HOW HOW
HOW HOW
HOW,,HOW
ITNA NA BHONKO LOG KYA KAHYGAY KUTTAY KAHI K..
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#46
SANTA: DUBAI me sub kuch FREE hai
TAXI
HOTEL
KHANA
PINA
YAHA TAK
SEX BHI
FREE HAI
BANTA : are yaar TU kub gaya tha
SANTA; mai nahin meri bibi jakar ayi hai
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#47
Jis gali se tum gujro,
Jis raah se gujro,
Kuch aisa kar gujro,
ki
har bar…
har gali se…
1 hi aavaz aaye-
‘MARO SAALE KO, PHIR Aa GAYA’
—– —
#48
Santa(Ladki ko chhedte huye)- Hi soniye, kya haal he
Ladki(Gusse me)- Vahi Jo teri bahen ka he.
Santa(Hanskar)- Wo to pregnent he. Hahaha
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#49
Santa:Judge Sahab,Muje Talaq Chahye.. Pichle 1Saal Se Meri Biwi Ne Mujse Bat Nhi Ki. Judge:1Baar Firse Sochle,Aisi Biwi Kismt Se Milti He
—– —
#50
Angry Boss: Have you ever seen an owl
Employee: (looking down) No Sir…
Boss: Don’t look down. Look at me.
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