Mama Jokes – Set 12 – 2017

#1

Yo wife so fat she got more nooks and Crannies than a Ploughman’s pastry

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#2

Yo Sister so fat she got a new job DJ’ing for the Ice Cream Van.

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#3

Yo Dog so fat that when you take it ‘walkies’ it don’t know whether it walking or rolling

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#4

Your Mommas so fat, when it says All you can eat it still ain’t enough.

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#5

Yo’ Astronomer so fat she plays pool with Venus….and Neptune…and pluto…and…

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#6

Yo Moma…

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#7

has 10 fingers — all on the same hand.

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#8

has green hair and thinks she’s a Tree.

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#9

has a peanut butter wig with jelly sideburns.

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#10

has wooden boobs and breast feeds beavers

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#11

has one short leg and that why she always walking in circles…

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#12

has a major weight problem – she can’t wait…to eat.

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#13

got a house that’s so dusty, the Cockroaches drive around in Dune Buggies

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#14

got a glass eye with a fish in it.

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#15

got so much hair on her upper lip she has to braid it

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#16

got so much dandruff that a Midgie landed on her head and said: ‘Christ, I aint’ seen this much snow in years.’

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#17

got so much hair on her chest that her Breasts remind me of Coconuts…

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#18

is a carpenter’s dream – flat as a board and so easy to nail…

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#19

Yo Grannies got more chins than a Hong Kong phone book.

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#20

You got no arms, no legs, and when you go swimming they call you Bob

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#21

Yo Wife got more weave than a dog in rush hour traffic.

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#22

Yo Girlfriend got an ElectroWig – including sunroof and Opera lights

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#23

Yo Big brother got a wooden nipple and they call him Corky.

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#24

Yo Priest got ears so big he gets satellite reception.

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#25

Your kid bro got more crust round his mouth than a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken.

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#26

Yo Milkman’s teeth so damn yellow I can’t believe it’s not butter

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#27

Yo Mother in law so yellow you’d think she’d been blowing the Simpsons

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#28

Yo mama’s got a wooden leg with branches. Yo’ baby sister got more mouth than Julia Roberts

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#29

Yo’ Boy next door got an Afro with a turn signal in it.

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#30

Yo Doc’ got 1 wooden leg with a real foot.

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#31

You geeky Star Wars girlfriend got more bum fur than an Ewok.

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#32

Yo Mommy got so many gaps in her teeth it reminds me of Piano keys

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#33

Yo Best Friend only got two fingers and she’s a representative for world peace.

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#34

Yo’ humor webmaster so desperate for money he got a wooden leg with advertisements stapled to it.

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#35

You Computer Geek friend got one tooth and they call him Chomping-at-the-Bits

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#36

Yo’ Nana’s teeth so damb black you’d think she had coal for her dinner

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#37

Yo Grannie had more men than the grand old duke of york…and then some…

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#38

Your Auntie got one leg…and folk call her Eileen

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#39

Yo kid sister got so many rings round her belly that she gotta screw her underware on

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#40

Yo cousin got 3 teeth … one in her mouth and two in her pocket.

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#41

Yo PE teacher has one arm and swims round in circles

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#42

Yo Dentist got Summer teeth…summer in his mouth….summer in his trouser pockets…

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#43

You Wife got more crack than harlem

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#44

Your Dentist made yo teeth so crooked you use them to cut chain at the DIY store.